Adopt Me!
by TheSarcasticOneThatLikesMCR13
Summary: Tre Cool of Green Day adopts a teenage boy, funnies and sads ensue :) Enjoy (AU)
1. Chapter 1

I sat at the desk and chewed on one of my short nails.

"So Mr. umm Cool? You wish to adopt a teenager?" The tall bland woman said in an annoying, bitchy way

"No, I just came here for shits and giggles" the lady frowned disapprovingly "Sorry nerves bring on sarcasm" I tried to explain, she just stared blankly at me

"Right well we currently have three eligible teenagers I'm afraid they are all boys, I hope that's not a problem?" She narrowed her eyes daring me to piss her off

"No, no that's absolutely fine" I smiled at her

"Well Ok then I'm afraid you won't get a chance to chose, because that would not be fair on the others, so we will see which one you are most eligible to take care off and then see were we go from there, is your wife here?"

"Yeah she's just made of- I mean uh no she and I are um not together any longer, does it not say that in your file thingy?" I tried to cover my tracks... It wasn't working.

"No it does not. We will contact you in due course thank you for your time Mr... Cool" she finished collecting up her papers before scuttling out of the room

"Your welcome" I murmured as I also collected my things and left.

"And then she was like there all boys and if that's a problem I will pull the broom outta my ass and beat cha' with it and I was like I don't give a fuck!" I finished, having had to explain the story three times now I was getting a little carried away. Billie just laughed and shook his head.

"You do realise you are gonna get some homophobic Bieber lover don't you?" he asked me

"Don't even joke like that man, it's not fuckin' funny!" I frowned panicking at the thought of some blonde haired, blue eyed, goose stepping, baby singing, pig slaughtering-

"Tre, dude are you ok" Mike asked breaking my train of thought

"Yep I'm fine" I said tightly before announcing I needed to go home, get out the Geiger counter and make sure my house was still safe for other human inhabitants.

This was going to be interesting I thought as I listened to some dude bullshiting about the weather on the radio. The car journey was getting painful now, I just wanted to get home and sleep so I didn't have to think about this blonde haired, blue eyed... No kid, it's a kid you jackass not fuckin' Hitler! I yelled at myself. I sighed I wasn't getting any sleep tonight.


	2. Chapter 2

The high pitched ring is getting louder it's so loud, I'm trying to run the ground is going beneath me, the ringing is louder there's no ground now just air and grass rushing up to meet me, no not grass it's THUD carpet

"Mother fucker!" I yell in pain as I fall off the couch, there was that fuckin' ringing again… and again I can't work out what it is. It's not ringing anymore it's banging and shouting it's a latch clicking. I can't move I don't know why, I'm just on the floor staring up at the ceiling arms flopped at my sides. More shouting not long now I think, I try to shout but all that comes out is a sigh.

"Fuck! Tre are you Ok?" Billie comes running over to me and shakes me by the shoulders

"Me? Who? What? Hang on, what? Wait? What?" I stare into his wild green eyes

frowning.

"Are you OK?" He asks again slower this time like he's talking to a five year old who has fallen off the swing

"Your eyes are really pretty from this angle" I blurt out. Billie grins at me then helps me back up onto the couch.

"We tried calling and ringing the bell and knocking but you didn't answer" He explained

"Tre?" I hear Mike shout from upstairs

"I'm in the living room!" I shout to him, the poor guy would be looking for years if we didn't point it out to him, all that weed must have frazzled his brain some. Billie nods and laughs, he knows exactly what I'm thinking. Mike comes into the room and smiles I smile back as he perches on the chair across from the couch. We sit in silence for a moment before I say

"Shall we go?" Billie and Mike nod at me and follow me out of the front door

"So you had a call from the broom lady yet?" Billie asks grinning at the conversation we had yesterday.

"No… or I wouldn't have been crashed out on my couch would I?" I roll my eyes at the older guy he just grins again and climbs into Mike's car before reaching out his hand and demanding the keys from Mike. Mike just roles his eyes and hands them over, there is no point in fighting with Billie he always wins with his big I'm-inoccent-my-eyes-are-large-and-puppy-like-and-green-as-the-leaves-on-the-trees-don't-make-me-cry act, it's really annoying.

Once back at Billie's I set my mobile down on the table and stare at it.

"You know you can't scare a phone into ringing by giving it the evil eye" Mike jeers at me as he gets a can of beer from Billie's fridge.

"Haha, whatever, I just wanna be ready" I explain laughing humourlessly at Mike's sorry attempt at comedy

"Ready for what? The alien invasion?" Billie smirks as he also enters the room and gets a can of beer from the fridge. I just roll my eyes and fixate on my phone once more. RING…RING…RING oh shit it's ringing. I should really pick that up, but I don't to _why? You chicken?_ No I just…

"Hello Tre Cool's phone speaking?" Billie picks up the call "uh huh, uh huh, uh huh… Tre its for you"

"No shit Sherlock" I say as I take the phone from his hand "Uh hello? Yes this is Tr- No I'm- Well I believe we discu- Really? You're serious? That's great thank you OK yep, yep, uh huh, yep, see you then… thank you, yes, Good b… The bitch hung up on me, I can't believe it oh and I get the kid" The guys grin at me and throw a can of beer at me… an open can I might add, the bastards!

P.O.V ?

I stare at the now empty screen of my mobile I'm getting adopted. This is crazy I've been in care since I was like six. I pulled my laptop out from under my bed and turn it on. As I'm waiting for it to warm up I hear an all to familiar sound…. "NEEOOOOWWWWWN" just stay quiet and he will forget you're here and leave you alone

"Hi Xander!" _FUCK! _The little shite could see me, but this worked so well at school. I frowened.

"What do you want twerp?" I hissed at the little boy stood in my bed room door way

"To play!" He yelled jumping up and down with the toy plane in his hand

"No, go away" I rolled my eyes at the little rat

"PLAY" He yelled throwing the toy plane at me, it hit my thigh...

"You wanna play Jack... Huh?"

"Yeah Yeah Yeah-" BOOM HEADSHOT! I threw the toy and it hit him right on the forhead knocking him to the floor I grinned and walked over shuting the door on him. My laptop had finaly loaded and I went straight on twitter to talk to my personal therapist 'TheFinalEpisode' they were great. I loggod on and started typing out my DM all I got in reply was "YAYAYAYAYAYAY :D" so I just grinned at the screen like an idiot until Anna walked in, she was the woman who ran my foster home.

"Xander, what on earth were you thinking throwing that toy at his head, you could have cracked his skull!" She yelled at me, I just sat there blankly staring at her " and you never walk the dog, go do it now!" she finished her rant

"No" I relied in a deadpan voice

"What? why"

"because I'm EMO, EMO's don't walk we sulk, I will sulk the dog, I won't walk it" '_that is so going on Twitter'_

"You're not an EMO now get over yourself and walk the goddamn dog, apologize to Jack and tidy your before Mr. Whathisface gets sees it tommorow." She stalked out of the room slamming the door

"It's Cool, you douche" I mummur under my breath. I say goodbye to 'TheFinalChapter' before uncerimoniously pulling the power chord out of my fucked up laptop and killing it. I grin as the screen dies.


	3. Chapter 3

P.O.V Billie

We sat in the car. I was driving, of course. I don't know why they always forced me to drive it's not like I beg _hehehehehe. _We sat in silence Tre next to me in the front, he looked at me and smiled. I couldn't believe it he was finaly getting a kid. I mean, I know it wasn't how we had always planned it but... _woh woh woh, what the fuck? I'm not his life partner, dude get a hold of yourself!_ I know it probably wasn't how _he _planned it ya know but, well I just couldn't wait. Finally Jake and Joey would have a buddy, a brother maybe. _Not in that way you sick fucks I have a wife! _

"You cool, Cool?" I asked him he just grinned and nodded like a five year old

"Hey Billie stop at the next service station" Mike demanded from the back seat _hehehehe_

"I told you Micheal you should have gone before we left" I said mimicking his pain-in-the-ass mother

"Fuckin' hilarious BJ I'm hungry" He rolled his blue eyes at me, folding his arms across his chest defensively

"Has someone got the munchies again?" I grinned in the rear-view mirror "I told you no weed before car journies but do you ever listen to little old me? no never you are always so busy just-

"BILLIE" Tre yelled, I swerved just in time as we almost hit a small boy running across the road

"Holy shit!" I yelled as I pulled over the car and we all got out to see if this kid was still alive

"Please don't be dead" I kept on saying over and over when a voice from behind us said

"Why couldn't you just have kept on driving straight? huh? It could been a fox or a cat or a small dog you need never have know" The person finished I frowned at the teenage boy. He had shoulder length black hair and pale skin if it weren't for his blue eyes I could swear I just bumped into Gerard Way. The small boy ran to him arms wide smile on his face.

"Xander, Xander, Xander that was fun I wanna do it again!" The teenager apparently named Xander just shoved the little boy to the ground then yelled

"Shit down, shut up and don't move or I swear to god Jack I will throw you under the next moving vehicle I see!" The little boy pouted but made no move to get up or even cry for his mother he just sat there playing with a blade of grass.

"Is he OK?" I asked tentativly "I almost hit him with my car"

"Yeah he looks fine to me" The boy said, it almost sounded like he was disapointed.

"XANDER!" I heared a woman yell and then the sound of foot steps which could only be described as 'angry mom on a mission', A short stout woman with a red face and a green jumper rounded the corner and just stared at the little boy on the floor. She then narrowed her eyes and glared at the teenager

"What did you do?"

"Nothing" He said once again almost disapointedly

"Get inside and bring Jack with you Mr. eeerrr...ummm-

"Cool?"

-Cool is coming soon to meet you"...

_oh fuck!_

P.O.V Tre

-Cool is coming soon to meet you"...

_oh fuck!_ I just stared at the teenager in front of me before glacing at Billie Joe our eyes met and I knew we were thinking the same thing... _oh fuck._ I frowened at the floor before piping up and saying

"I'm " I smiled at the stout woman, she frowned at her watch then simply stated

"I have to get Jack to swimming in fifteen minutes so either stay or go I don't really mind, If you want to take him fill out the forms on the kitchen counter I will sign them when I get back" She then looked up at me and gave a small smile

"I'm sure you two will get along fine" She then walked of leaving me with this kid. At least he looked like a rocker.

"So... What kind of music do you like?" I asked almost scared to hear him talk to me.

"My Chemical Romance" He said matter of factly

"Oh cool, There great I've met them a few times, there nice guys" I said casualy, I didn't know if he knew who I was so I thought I would play the whole thing cool-casual and see how that turned out...

"I don't really like Green Day that much by the way"... Not very well I see

"Well, thats fine I mean each to thier own" I smiled, man this was going to be hard work.

"You don't want to uh... take me do you?" He asked, he glanced at the ground and in that one moment of weakness I saw just how vulnerable and childlike this kid really was.

"What are you talking about? Course I do, I'm sure with a bit of time we will get used to eachother. Plus my house is huge so I can always find somewhere to hide from you" the kid smiled at me

"I wouldn't be so sure I smell fear like a shark smells blood" He grinned. maybe this wasn't going to be so bad afterall.


	4. Chapter 4

Hi guys, sorry it's been so long I've been either having a serious case of writers block or getting stoned so… yeah but this is the next chapter and I hope you enjoy. Rage and Love x

P.O.V Xander

I walked through the front door and started to head for the kitchen when a small voice piped up

"Uh dude I think you left your little brother outside" I turned sharply, it was the midget with the messy hair and guyliner that Billie Jean guy or whatever his name was.

"He not my brother and it's fine, that's where he sleeps" All three of them stood there wide eyed "Guys chill out I'm kidding!" I grinned and started back towards the door. When I looked outside he was sat just where I left him playing with the grass.

"Jack, come on" I shouted

"No" was his whiney reply.

"Jack, now!" I bellowed

"No!"

"Right that's you have five seconds before I make so you can't sit down for a month!" I threatened. His eyes widened, I knew I had him, I started to count down. He leapt up off the grass and ran as fast as e could to the front door as he crossed the threshold my foot may have slipped outwards… well whatever happed he went down like an oak tree in a hurricane

"Mind the step!" Was all I managed to say before I cracked up with laughter. Jack started to tear up so I grabbed him by the shirt yanked him up and dusted him off.

"There not a scratch on you" I said to him, I didn't usually care if he got hurt but when got all silent and teary eyed it just brought back memories of hiding in the cupboard under the stairs and I had to do something. He smiled at me and tried to give me a hug, I shoved him backwards lightly

"Woah woah woah, no! You know I don't do that shit" I frowned at him. He stuck his tongue out at me so I gave him a small smile. I ruffled his hair and headed for the kitchen.

"Xander, Anna says I have to go now" Jack said quietly from the kitchen door way. I looked at him and then told him to stay where he was before running to my room quickly I came back in to the kitchen and threw him a small necklace, the pendant was a wooden 'X' he grinned and put it on. I knelt down in front of him and said

"Listen, I don't know when I'm going, but once I'm gone I'm never coming back so never forget. The world is ugly but there's always beauty somewhere. Never let them take the light behind your eyes." I smiled before ushering him to leave but before he went and before i could react he leapt on me and gave me a hug. I did'nt move, not an inch but when he pulled away I patted him on the head. Anna called for him again and he dashed of out the front door. I shook my head and turned to see all eyes on me.

"Uh ya' know I'm not here for entertainment, I won't start singing or dancing if you stare at me for long enough" All three of their heads snapped away and started observing the floor, ceiling or shelving. It was pretty funny and I, for some stupid reason started to giggle. The tall blonde one just looked at me like I had gone crazy before shaking his head and smiling.

"How long have you been in care for?" He asked, brave guy.

"Mike what the fuck? If someone had said that to you twenty years ago you would have them" Billie Jean hissed at him

"It was just a question, plus no one else was gonna say anything were they" Mike retaliated

"Well it's hardly a conversat…. I tuned out of their argument and started to watch the Tre guy, the one who wanted to adopt me. He was leaning against the door frame banging his head on the wall. This whole squabbling thing must happen often then. I kept on staring at him and he seemed to notice he gave me a sympathetic smile and I looked away. I don't need his sympathy or his kindness I'm not a fuckin' charity case _dude chill out he's just sorry you have to listen to them arguing_whatever. I tuned back in to the lovers tiff that was taking centre stage.

"Oh yeah nice one Mike"

"Shut it BJ"

"Or what?"

"Or I won't let you drive"

"Oh yeah well then how are you gonna get home huh?"

"It's my fuckin' car fucktard!"

"Oh yeah…"

I cleared my throat and they both looked at me

"Sorry man, I didn't mean to be personal" Mike apologized

"Nah it's fine. I 've been in care since I was nine because my dad was a drunk mongrel" I gave a small smile as they all tried to not act sympathetic knowing I would hate it. I picked up the papers and put them down the kitchen table before heading to my room.

**There you go my lovelies **** Review, Ra****ge and Love x**


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